


Love Lockdown

by vtedy1



Series: Love through the ages [2]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: China is a good brother, Kids helping, M/M, Married couple getting back together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:47:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28191165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vtedy1/pseuds/vtedy1
Summary: The world is locked down in a pandemic and with it so is Constantine (Byzantine) together with a very eager Kyla (Bulgaria). This work can be read after The Third Way, which explains how Constantine and Kyla met and fell in love. Otherwise you would probably not know what this is about.
Relationships: Bulgaria/Byzantine Empire (Hetalia)
Series: Love through the ages [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2065230
Comments: 5
Kudos: 6





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

On a bright and sunny day Constantine was woken up from a pleasant dream by his younger brother, sort of younger as Herakles had taken up until his revolution days to grow up, loudly banging on his front door.

As Constantine was living on his brother’s land he technically had to be on his beck and call as well, no matter how rude Herakles was about it. So Constantine got up, got dressed and walked downstairs to greet him.

“Good morning, brother. What brings you to me on this fine day?” He said as he opened the door and Herakles strolled in, not waiting to be invited.

“Bulgaria is changing up his electricity prices and holding up the gas pipeline construction back! Go reason with your headache about it! I don’t have the time for his petty attempts at extortion, Turkey is trying to steal my coast line because he finally figured out I have gas and oil in there.”

“My headache…well he certainly is that. But why can’t you open negotiations with him yourself? You’re the nation here, not me.”

“I told you already, I don’t have the time for it! There is a new virus on the rise and I have to figure how to stop my hospitals from overflowing. And then there are all the Syrian refugees I have to house! Pull your weight if you want to live here and negotiate when I tell you to!”

Whit that Herakles turned around and walked out. Constantine closed the door behind him and went upstairs to pack. It was sad that he had went from having Herakles answering to him to him answering to Herakles. He used to be an Empire and now he was just a messenger for his brother.

When he was done packing for a two day stay at the most he went to his garage and got in his car. Making his way across the border and towards the hermit house in the Rilla Mountain that Kyla called home.

After passing the checkpoint set around the property Constantine drove the rest of the way upwards in the mountain, finally reaching the house itself. It was a modern looking brick house, as it was built in the middle of the mountain on purpose after Bulgaria’s former house got destroyed in the bombings of Sofia during the Second World War.

It was also big, as Bulgaria had his “army of grown up former toddlers”, as he called them after said nations made a fuss at being referred to as toddlers by their “uncle” one Christmas dinner, visiting him and staying over even when they just needed someone to talk to.

Constantine went to knock on the door when it was suddenly all but torn off its hinges and a happy Bulgaria ran up to hug him.

“Tine! You came to visit me! The people from the checkpoint warned me and I had time to make you your favorite food! Come inside, the drive must have been a long one. Its a little cold in March this far up in the mountain, are you cold? I’ve made you some hot chocolate!”

At that Constantine felt a little guilty. He had long ago made peace with the fact that they hadn’t gotten a divorce only because Bulgaria refused it. It seemed that Kyla still held a candle out for him and hoped to get back together. And Constantine had come here to negotiate a better trade deal, which would surely dash Bulgaria’s hopes.

“My brother sends me. You’re not upholding your agreements with him as he is about to prepare to go to war. He can’t come here personally so here I am.”

At that Kyla’s face really did fall. He started to look suspiciously at Constantine and gave him a questioning look before releasing the man from his embrace.

“It’s him and his constant strikes that make trouble at the border. I don’t remember not upholding a deal agreement with him. Not on purpose, that is. Let’s get inside and talk this over some hot chocolate, Tine. It’s good seeing you, even if your brother had to twist your arm to get you to come over.”

Constantine couldn’t help but notice how bitterly the last part was said. But Bulgaria had only himself to blame. If the man hadn’t started so many wars with him back during the Dark Ages then they wouldn’t be barely on speaking terms.

With that Constantine was led inside the house and he noticed that it looked and smelled freshly cleaned. Even back then in their house in China Bulgaria had had servants to do the cleaning. Constantine wondered absent mindedly how Kyla faired now that this was no longer an option.

He got seated on the couch and a mug filled with hot chocolate was placed in his hands. The smile now returning on the Bulgarian’s lips.

“So what did I do this time for that little sh…your dear brother to send you?”

The near insult hadn’t escaped Constantine and he snorted.

“Herakles says you are rigging his electricity prices and that you aren’t building your end of a gas pipeline…again. Kyla what is it with you and not building gas pipelines? You know Ivan is going to become pissed with you and bypass you entirely one of these days.”

“I know, I know. But there has been a new virus that is flooding my hospitals and I’ve been busy with that. As for the electricity it’s probably something my politicians did behind my back. I’ll put a stop on it, you can tell Herakles he won’t be paying extra this month and if he needed to pay more last month I’ll make it up to him. Anyway it’s late at night. You’ll stay here instead of driving in the dark, won’t you?”

At that Constantine hesitated before answering.

“I was thinking of staying at a hotel down in the city, but it’s already ten at night. I guess…If you feel like hosting me…” His sentence was broken by a loud squeal that Bulgaria gave out and he was once again in the man’s embrace.

“Of course I’ll host you! I made dinner with that in mind. To tell you the truth I would have kidnapped you if you have refused to stay!”

With that Kyla got off the couch and began setting the table. Constantine just stood in his spot, thinking that coming here was a mistake he was going to regret. It would be all too easy for him to fall back on his old habits. Just as he was hugged again he had the urge to hug Kyla back. He had to remember that what Bulgaria did before he went into a coma had been unforgivable.

He could be on speaking terms with the man, maybe give in a little and restore some of their friendly banter. But under no circumstance was he going to start falling back in love with that warhound. He was just going to get his heart broken again.

They sat and Constantine had to admit he was really served his favorites. Stuffed peppers with cream sauce, freshly baked wheat bread, still warm from the oven, and for desert there was chocolate soufflés. Not to mention a finely made salad that brought freshness to the whole meal.

Once the soufflés were eaten Kyla put a packet of popcorn in the microwave in order for them to have something to snack on while watching a movie. They ended up watching the new Tiger King on Netflix, courtesy of Bulgaria using a VPN to access USA’s Netflix selection.

“This is the strangest documentary I’ve ever seen! Tine, what these two main characters are doing with these wild animals is appalling. Feeding human flesh to a wild animal would just make it crave it more, making it into a man-eater. If that lady really fed her husband to a bunch of wild cats then she just paved the way for missing zoo keepers!”

“This lady? She is a world renowned animal conservationist who has saved countless wild cats from people like Joe Exotic! Besides is that the only thing you took from all the series? Him drugging his lovers passed you right by, didn’t it?”

“Of course it didn’t pass me by, Tine. He is just as bad as her, if not more. But can you believe how crazy are zoo owners over at Alfred’s place? Polygamy, petting zoos, murder and drugs? Why can’t they have quiet lives like mine and yours…I mean Herakles’s.”

At that Kyla looked a little guilty. It was an unspoken rule between them not to mention the fact that Constantine was no longer a nation anymore and that he lived at his brother’s place. Sometimes Constantine felt like Kyla would have preferred if Constantine was the personification of Greece rather than Herakles.

“Anyway, its tomorrow now. Time for us to get to bed.” Said Kyla as he stretched and put an arm over Constantine’s shoulder, purely on accident.

“Do you still keep my room furnished or do I take the couch, Kyla?” That was Kyla’s cue to look like an abandoned puppy.

“Your room will always be yours. I wouldn’t give it to anyone else for the world! I just need to return your pillows.”

“What have you done with my pillows?! You know I might just stay on the couch.”

Kyla waved his arms in front of his face defensively, as if waiting for a hit to come. When it didn’t he chuckled nervously and lowered them. 

“They still smelled of you from when you came by in the beginning of February so I, kind of, cuddled them but don’t get mad I changed your pillowcases with fresh ones! Purple silk and vanilla scent, just like you like it!”

At that Constantine exhaled loudly and buried his face in his hands.

“You can’t keep doing things like this, Kyla. I said back in 2007 we can become friends again, not that we are getting back together. Friends don’t cuddle each other’s pillows just because their smell lingered. You may not be giving me a divorce but you have to realize that we are over. You made it happen.”

“I’m sorry.” Came the silent reply. “I’ll just give you your pillows and leave you to sleep.”

After that Kyla did as promised and gave up the pillows. Constantine pretended he didn’t notice the sad lingering look Kyla gave him before he went to his own room, which was just next to Constantine. Something Constantine was sure was done on purpose.

The morning after Constantine woke up to the smell of pancakes and groaned. He should have figured out Kyla wasn’t giving up and was going to try to win him over with pancakes, as he usually did when Constantine found himself in the man’s house. It didn’t help that Kyla still made the pancakes with the same recipe he had used back then in the first days in their house in China. Which made the nostalgic feelings hit Constantine like a speeding train.

He went to the bathroom in the end of the hall and showered fast and prepared for an awkward breakfast where Kyla was probably going to try and get him to stay at his place until the end of the week, at least. Just as he dressed and was preparing to head downstairs he heard his phone ringing from his room.

Figuring it was his brother he made his way quickly towards the phone and picked it up. When he saw that it was indeed Herakles on the phone he answered.

“Hey, brother. Everything has been cleared out and I’ll be heading back after breakfast. Is there anything on the road you would like me to pick up?”

“That is good to hear but Constantine you can’t head back, the borders are closed because of the pandemic. You’ll have to stay with Bulgaria until they reopen.”

“What do you mean they closed? I just passed through them yesterday! Is Bulgaria making you close your borders in order for me to stay with him? Just what did he offer you for you to harm your own trade like that?”

“Don’t be so full of yourself, baby brother.” Came the now angry reply. “The virus I’ve been dealing with is a serious deal! The borders will remain closed until the situation is dealt with. Considering he still cries over you he is unlikely to turn you away. I know he is a horrible headache, and that is putting it nicely, but you’ll just have to play your role of a happy husband for a few weeks. You married him and I’m not reopening the borders just for you so live with him!”

At that his brother closed the phone and Constantine was left stunned, phone still pressed to his ear. Now, he knew that Herakles had never forgiven him for stealing his inheritance and not fighting for him during his revolution but for him to just up and leave him was just cold. They were brothers, something like providing him an escort shouldn’t have been denied to him.

He put down his phone on the bedside table and went downstairs, now faced with having to deliver the news to Bulgaria. But as it turned out he didn’t have to as Kyla was singing along to a remix of “Love Lockdown” while flipping the pancakes. So he knew.

Upon seeing him Bulgaria’s smile widened even more and he stopped singing.

“Tine! The people from the checkpoint called. It’s blocked and going to remain like this for three weeks. All my cities are closed too. I spoke with Herakles and told him you’ll be staying with me for this time. It would be just like it was like back in our first house! It’s great, isn’t it?”

“Yes, great…” Said Constantine and prepared for the worst three weeks in his life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks a lot for the kudos and the commend! You guys are the best!

Chapter 2

Midway through their meal a knock came from the door. It did a good job in silencing Bulgaria’s chatter about a TV show he was watching on Netflix these past days as Kyla got up to see who it was.

From the door came a surprise for Constantine. The checkpoint around this part of the mountain had closed and yet in came Persia. Carrying in his hands a brightly wrapped gift.

“Kyla, dear, how have you been? Can you believe that just as your checkpoint was closing I was nearing your home? I nearly got stuck in the town at the foot of the mountain! Really, why do you need a checkpoint is beyond me!”

“Well, I am technically living in a national park, Persius. I need to do my part in protecting the wildlife and my own identity. I can’t have mortals coming to my house. They are so grass this days I’ll end up cleaning up broken glass and graffiti from the side of my house. There are pancakes for breakfast. You must be hungry, come and sit with Tine and I!”

“Young Constantine is here too? How…nice. I suppose that now the checkpoint is closed he’ll be staying?”

“You guessed it! It’s really wonderful that I’ll be having both of you over for the next three weeks! My friend and my husband in the same house. We are going to have so much fun together!”

With a slightly sour expression covered by a smile Persius entered the house, handing Bulgaria his gift as he did so. Kyla set it on the counter absentmindedly and pulled a chair on his left side for Persius to sit and he went to bring another plate and spoon for the Persian.

Persius sat down and with a smile full of teeth he began to speak with Constantine as soon as Bulgaria disappeared into the kitchen.

“Tine, good seeing you! Have you come over to good old Kyla to iron out your marriage problems? Say no! I have been having success with him and got him to talk to me in more…friendlier terms recently. It would be a big setback if you decided to move back in with him out of the blue.”

“Persius, still panting after my husband? When will you realize you will only be a friend to him? Besides he will never give me a divorce and he isn’t a cheater and I…haven’t met the proper person to do…stuff with. So that means I’m not one either. And besides you will only make him…”

At that Constantine stopped talking as Kyla had entered the dining room again. He happily placed the plate and utensils in front of Persia and moved the plater with the pancakes closer to his guest.

“What were you two talking about just now?”

“Oh, nothing much, dear. Just catching up after such a long time. Can you believe I haven’t seen Constantine since the New Year’s party at your place back in 2012? You know, back when he was convinced we were all going to die and that the Christian God was the one who gave the heads up to the Maya people? He was so adorable, panicking and talking to everyone as if he would never see them again.”

At Persius’s words Constantine loudly cut his pancake, scratching the plate in the process.

“Which in contrast was still better than what you did. Your son Saudi Arabia had to keep you from drinking yourself under the table because Kyla wouldn’t fu…notice you. Because he wouldn’t notice you.”

“He would have noticed me if you didn’t flirt with him as soon as you saw him. Hogging all his attention for yourself. But I suppose it is only normal for a married couple to behave like that. It is so good to finally see you two trying to get back together. You are…lovely together.”

That was said as Persia went to lick the tip of his pancake, hoping Bulgaria would see him, but Kyla turned his head right before he did it in order to lay another pancake in Byzantine’s plate. Persia’s expression soured even more after that but at this point only Constantine was paying him any attention. A smug smile adorning his face.

“You’d think so, wouldn’t you? Then again for you every couple is a good one. Seeing as you can’t keep a relationship going for more than a century. How is Carthalo, by the way? Has he ran off from you yet?”

“Tine!” Exclaimed Kyla and raised a finger at Constantine’s nose. “That was rude! Persius was originally going to come by for a week because they separated but now he’ll be staying for three. He has always been a great family friend, try to be nice, won’t you?”

“Family friend, Kyla? I spend the Dark Ages fighting on two major fronts: yours and his! Just what makes him a “family friend”? And don’t tell me that he is one just because you used to fight him nonstop as Scythia. That type of familiarity might be enough for you but he is still and will always be my enemy!”

At that Constantine got up from the table and stormed to his room, hearing Kyla apologize about his behavior behind him.

Stupid Kyla and even stupider Persius! They should just get together already and wage their little wars all they want. Keep everything “nice and fun”. Constantine knew them both for 21 centuries and he still couldn’t understand why the two loved war so much. Even now Persia’s mercenaries, the Islamic State, were wreaking havoc and Kyla was adding fuel to the fire, selling weapons to either side of the conflict.

Many nations were just like those two but Constantine couldn’t understand this way of thinking. He had fought for survival and the faith and in the end he had failed in protecting both. Fighting for the sake of fighting had never been to his liking. Not in the Roman Legion and definitely not during his time as an empire. 

But then again Constantine hadn’t been born a nation so it was only natural he couldn’t understand them, even after being one of them for as long as he had been. His musings were interrupted by a knock. Before he got up to answer Persia entered his room and closed the door behind him.

“I left Bulgaria making lunch so we don’t have much time to talk, little Tine. And we do need to talk, dear enemy of mine.”

“Fine, Persius, let’s talk. What sort of shit do you want to start today? Just be warned I don’t have a big sway with my brother and Kyla will believe me over you any day.”

“He would, blind with adoration as he is. But you see the thing is, and that’s the reason you can’t tame him, is that adoration is not love. I saw when he was head over heels for Carthalo and let me tell you: He doesn’t feel for you even half of what he felt back then. You don’t love him either so why don’t you pass him over? Let him be the fun loving Scythian you took away from me 21 centuries ago. Instead of the lost puppy you made him.”

“I didn’t take away anything from you, he wouldn’t have gotten together with me if there was even a chance he could love you. Ever. Now if your prissy fit is over get out of my room.”

As he said that Constantine made to stand up and open the door but failed as Persia just leaned on the door to block it.

“You want me out of your life? That can’t happen as long as Kyla counts me as one of his friends. And he doesn’t drop friends easily, as you well know. But I haven’t come here to threaten you. You’re not even a nation anymore, thanks to my dear son. I came here to propose a deal to you. Help me get Kyla as a lover and I’ll help you get your divorce.”

Constantine was about to bare his teeth and come to blows with Persia but then he stopped to think. Kyla would never give him a divorce if he didn’t cheat on him and for some reason Constantine didn’t want to be the one to put the last nail in their marriage’s coffin.

Besides cheating to your spouse was against the teachings of the Bible and if nothing else Constantine still considered himself religious, he had helped spread Christianity in the world, after all.

“How do you propose this to happen? I’m not sleeping with you and he won’t give you a second glance if I do. But you probably know that by now.”

“Oh, I do. Where Kyla’s morality comes from seeing as he is old enough to drop it is truly a wonder. No, I want you to make yourself scares in this three weeks so I can convince Kyla to pay attention to me. After that you’ll go back to the rock you crawled out of and I’ll stay to comfort him. If he cheats on you the result will be the same as if you cheat. His guilt will lead to a divorce and I’ll finally, after 32 centuries, get my dear warhound as a lover. If he starts flirting with everything that moves again I’ll just marry him. I can’t deny you trained him well and I can’t say I’ll mind his undivided attention. So, deal?”

Constantine actually gave it a good thought and not knowing why he nodded and shock the extended hand offered to him. Kyla deserved to have someone that actually wanted him. Sure, he had been a horrible husband at a time, but he had also been a good one for far bigger periods of it.

If this could get him a divorce and the ability to maybe find someone that actually thought and acted like he himself did, then why not? It was not as if Persia was ever going to tell Kyla they had agreed on this as it was going to harm his own chances. And hey, maybe the both of them would be happy with the sadistic-masochistic thing most nations had going. Constantine really wished them the best of luck.

“So what is it that you want me to do?”

“Oh, nothing much. Just keep your distance. Demand divorce if he gets too close to you. Little things you already do to hurt him in order for me to get close to him. But maybe don’t ruin today. I don’t want to have him associate my coming with your horrible relationship skills.”

“I can do that.” Said Constantine, deciding to let the jab at his relationship skills drop.

With that and a happy smile Persius exited the room and went downstairs. Constantine, wanting to watch the show, as Persia’s attempts at stealing his husband would be funny if nothing else, also went inside the kitchen.

There he found Persius happily slicing potatoes as Kyla was chatting away in a zoom meeting with Wang Yao. As they were speaking in Chinese, and Constantine hadn’t brushed up on his language skills ever since China learned English, he couldn’t understand what the two were saying. But by the loud “NI” and the defensive stance, also known as the facing a lecture stance, that Kyla had taken he was probably getting chewed up. Good old Yao was good at chewing up his adopted brother, it was a pity Constantine couldn’t understand why it was about now.

Deciding to use up his grace period of not having to make himself scarce today, he took a knife and began dicing some carrots that were placed in front of Persia.

When the meeting was over, easily understood by the loud exhale Kyla wouldn’t have dared to do while his Gege was still talking, Constantine snickered at his husband’s misfortune.

“Why is it” Began Bulgaria with a heavy sight. “that everyone and their mother gets on my case about that gas pipeline? Serbia whines at Vanya. Herakles whines at you and Turkey is probably whining at his dictator. I’ll get it done this year but I can hardly get it done in just three months! Two of which are impossible to dig in!”

Whit that Bulgaria sat in his chair and began cutting up the meat for the meal.

“If you have done it last year then maybe no one would have to have waited for you. Instead what did you do? Played at war with Alfred in Arabia again. You could actually take care of your people rather than going, in person, all the way to fight in Syria.”

“But fighting is so much fun, Tine! Alfred gave me command of some of his troops and I got to order air strikes! How cool is that?”

Constantine shock his head at that. War was still the only thing that was on Bulgaria’s mind even now. Some things never change.

The three of them finished preparing the meal and after watching the first episode of a TV show called “The Good Place”, whit Constantine noting how if Kyla ever died he would surely end up just like the main heroine to which Bulgaria answered saying he’ll hide his not belonging in Heaven better but wasn’t going to end up in the pansy side of Heaven but rather either with its Legions or he was going to escape to Hell, where a tactician like him would surely be welcomed. Persia piped in saying he’ll do the same, if only to rival Bulgaria for his place in Hell’s Legions.

To this Constantine loudly proclaimed he would, unlike them, remain in Haven to protect it. His loud proclamation was met with laughter and “It would be just like old times, huh little Tine.” From Persia and a “Well then I guess I’ll stay too to protect you from Persius, Tine!” from Kyla.

After they were done watching, whit Bulgaria periodically checking on the food, they ended up losing track of time and before they knew it lunch had been served for dinner.

Once again Bulgaria sat himself in the middle with Constantine on his right and Persia on his left. The meal had been delicious and they enjoyed it in relative silence. Upon finishing Constantine excused himself to his room, leaving a slightly saddened Bulgaria to play Rome: Total War with Persia.

Not knowing what else to do Constantine rummaged around his room until he found a canvas and his painting supplies. He sat down and tried to think about what to paint and before he knew it he already had the contours of a smiling Bulgaria done. With a heavy sight he placed the painting down and hid it under his bed, least Kyla found it and get his hopes up.

As he was drifting off to sleep he had the nagging suspicion he was going to return to this painting the very next day. 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Morning came and Constantine was woken up by a soft knock on his door. He sat up in the bed and was about to stand up when Bulgaria entered, caring a tray piled to the brim with food and a vase with a purple rose in it.

“Hey, sleepy head. It’s already 11so I figured I’ll bring your breakfast in bed. I’ll be walking Balkan later, you can come if you want.”

Balkan was a karakachan dog Constantine had gifted Kyla as a puppy back when Bulgaria had saved him from having Constantinople taken by Persia during the beginning years of the Dark Ages. Constantine had given the man much gold for his timely aid, but Kyla’s eyes had only shone for the puppy.

Now that it was fully grown the shepherd dog required a lot of walks, something Kyla was all too happy to provide.

“I could have eaten my food downstairs, you know. You didn’t have to arrange me a tray.”

“We can be friends that bring each other breakfast in bed, can’t we Tine? I’ve heard of plenty of friends like that. Sure most of them enjoy benefits…”

Just as Kyla sat the tray he ducked low as a pillow flew over his head.

“One more word of said “benefits” and I’m going to sleep in a tent outside! Then you’ll have to explain to all our children how you are so backwards as to not only deny me divorce but make me sleep outside!”

“Tine, I was just joking. You don’t have to say that ugly word so early in the morning. I have three weeks to get you to forgive me and get you back home again. I won’t waste them!”

With that Kyla exited the room and Constantine was left with his food. With an amused sight he noticed how Kyla had experimented with his coffee, trying to make it look like the stuff they served at Starbucks just because Constantine had mentioned he likes their coffee once.

Once Bulgaria got to do nice stuff like this it was hard to be mad at him. If Constantine was being honest with himself Bulgaria really hadn’t been to blame for the taking of Constantinople. The man was in a coma following his battle with the Golden Horde.

And it hadn’t been his fault Constantine had splinted after Kyla had left him for his own freedom after his rebellion. Kyla had been a nation, sort of, for much longer than Constantine had been alive. To have him as part of Byzantine Empire and not even as a free partner, no matter if the Emperor was half Bulgarian or not, must have been humiliating.

But Constantine had been mad at the false peace and blatant power grab Kyla had done during the rule of his Tsar Peter and so he hadn’t shown any mercy. Perhaps he should have. Even a false peace with Kyla was good and sweet.

As he finished thinking that he saw he has finished his breakfast: A cheese banitsa with yogurt with freshly picked strawberries from the greenhouse and of course his creamy coffee. He took the rose and took in its sweet fragrance.

Kyla had always loved flowers, but for him the purple roses were special as they were the only ones Constantine would help him tend to. For Kyla to still have such flowers in his greenhouse he must be keeping them only for Constantine’s benefit. The pigmentation being hard to produce and them sometimes changing colors if bees got to them.

Constantine quickly changed his train of thought and went to shower. Right next to the towels there were red and yellow rose petals mixed in with the purple. Probably something done in hopes of “friendship with benefits”. Chuckling at the attempt at romance he made a heart shaped figure with the red and yellow petals and then out of spite used the purple ones to make an “X” shape over it.

Figuring Kyla would get the message and clean up the mess he took a shower, got dressed and got downstairs. His mood strangely lifted.

There he was awaited by an exited Balkan and even happier Kyla. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed how Persia was already dressed for the cold weather. The man clearly hoped to go outside with Kyla and the eager dog.

Deciding to give operation “pass over the hubby” its first real chance he made an excuse that he was having a headache and excused himself from the walk. With that and a grateful “Get well soon, little Tine.” From Persius the two men and one dog were out and into the fresh spring day.

Without having much to do Constantine decided to return the favor and make dinner, as Balkan was a demanding dog and not likely to end his exercise before nightfall. He worked on autopilot and without noticing he had made a nice warm chicken soup and crotons.

He stood there just staring at the soup. Kyla really liked it when he made this type of soup. It was one of the first foods that Constantine ever cooked for his husband and so it brought memories of their first years of marriage.

Deciding not to dwell on it he went back to his room, hoping to get some work done on his laptop. Constantine was a freelance graphical designer, as his gold had all been stolen by Turkey when Constantinople had fallen and relying on his brother, or worse yet, on Kyla, left a bad taste in his mouth.

He spend the whole day drawing a new logo he was working on and so when a figure stood in his doorway he didn’t notice anything at first. Not wanting to be ignored Persius knocked on the door and cleared his throat. 

That made Constantine snap out of his focus and give him his attention.

“So how did it go, Persius? Did you have any luck?”

“Hardly. I spend all day running after that overgrown puppy and Kyla and didn’t get any acknowledgement at all. What is worse the dog didn’t want to play with me and it kept getting between Kyla and I. But I saw downstairs that you put some effort into making some soup! Seeing as Kyla all but teared up at the sight of it and went to get some roses for the dining table I don’t think you understood our plan all too well.”

At that Constantine frowned. Kyla couldn’t be so hopeful that he was reading too much into something as simple as soup, was he? Sure the man lived like a hermit in the middle of nowhere. And didn’t have friends and little children living with him anymore but surely he wasn’t so lonely that he took crumbs for treasures?

“It’s just some soup. I didn’t feel like having Kyla play as a personal chef for the both of us and so I cooked today. You know, the thing you usually leave for your servants to do back at your manor.”

“Well, you could have made something that didn’t make him into a sentimental sap! You were all he talked to me about the whole day and now he is probably singing to himself picking purple roses for the dining table! If I didn’t know any better I would have said you didn’t want a divorce as much as you claim you do, little Tine!”

“It was just some soup, drop it! Just because you are as interesting as drying paint doesn’t mean it’s my fault Kyla didn’t talk to you. Just what did you try to talk to him about? The plummeting oil prices?”

“Well, I…how did you know?”

At that Constantine laughed mockingly.

“You could have talked to him about the beauty of the surrounding nature. Of the scents that were surrounding you two from the wild flowers and the flowering trees. Of the gentle stream that passes through the property. Of the mini waterfalls Kyla made into it for…my…well…birthday. Ok, I guess this place is a bit too seeped with memories of the two of us but you could have tried to romance him harder. You had the whole day, it’s your fault you failed.”

As they were talking the two didn’t notice a hesitant Bulgaria standing just out of sight but not out of earshot. It hurt, to be entirely truthful. Constantine had gone from literary growling at anyone Bulgaria paid attention to to talking so freely about something like someone else’s attempts at stealing him away casually.

But he would forgive him. And figure out what to do. He needed help and advice. His first thought was to ask Wang Yao for advice on what to do but as his brother’s marriage to Tibet was as broken, if not more so, than Bulgaria’s own he would probably get the advice to kidnap Constantine’s spiritual leader or something. And not give divorce no matter what. 

That left Ivan. Granted his honorary nephew’s attempts with love had been a disaster, if the fact that Alfred still called Vanya a “Commie” was any indication, but he could still provide a fresh opinion. This was more than he could ask for nowadays.

With that Bulgaria went inside his room and forwarded a video call to Ivan. After a few minutes and a happy “Uncle!” from the other side he was finally connected.

“Vanya, if, hypothetically, Alfred were to decide to pass you over to another man in an attempt to get rid of your affections, what would you do?”

“Oh, that’s easy Uncle: I break every bone in the third party’s body and then I explain to Alfred that I would not tolerate such behavior. Why, is Uncle Constantine trying to pass you over to someone else? Uncle, you don’t have nukes…and your army is…well, it’s small. Don’t try and pick fights, da?”

Noticing the slightly worried look on his nephew’s face Bulgaria was quick to shake his head to convince him that he wasn’t going to do anything rash.

“No, no. I don’t pick fights with nations over something as petty as emotions anymore! I just need an advice on how to turn their plan, which is Persia and your Uncle Constantine’s, vile, vile plan on its head. How do I make Constantine regret, not in a painful way Vanya! And here I thought you think better of me! How do I make him become remorseful about his choice?”

“Well Uncle there is only one way: romance him! And ignore Persia hard! You see, your problem is that you are too opportunistic and don’t stick up for Uncle Constantine all that often. Or at least you didn’t back when he was Byzantine Empire. Take his side in an argument, even if he is wrong. Take a blow for him in, well not in an actual war since that will fail my plans for making a gas pipe for the Balkan Peninsula and Europe. By the way Uncle, have you even started digging for the gas pipeline yet? It’s a really important business venture for me, you can’t delay!”

“Yes, yes. The holy pipeline! I started it but I make no promises on when it’s going to be done. So, let us return to your advice. So you want me to be sneaky and pretend I all but worship your Uncle Constantine, since simple love isn’t enough for him. Is that correct?”

“Huh? I didn’t say you have to go to such extremes! But if you do don’t just “pretend”, da? Alter your behavior. And…well Uncle Constantine may not look it but he really misses being a nation and having something to do. And you like ignoring your people anyway, no offence meant Uncle. Why don’t you get him in on your projects? Perhaps have him help with the gas pipeline? Then at least I’ll know it will be done this year.”

At that Kyla breathed a sight. He supposed he could do that. Constantine was always better at planning the logistics of large projects than him. If all it took to have his family life the way he wanted it was for him to share some of his burdens then he would gladly do it. His politician’s grumbling aside.

“Ok, thanks Vanya. But how are you holding up in your house? Do you have enough to eat? Should I send you some food?”

At that Ivan just chuckled and shook his head for no.

“You never change, do you Uncle? But now you have to! I don’t want to have to call Persia “Uncle”, you hear? Uncle Constantine is the best uncle! You tell him that and that I said hi when you see him, da?”

With that and an amused expression on his face Ivan turned off the video call. Leaving behind a grumbling Kyla, who repeated the words “Uncle Constantine is the best uncle!” a couple of times as if they were something blasphemous.

Deciding to take baby steps he went downstairs and set the table. This time setting Persia right across from him rather than next to him. To better watch his enemy who would masquerade as a family friend to the bitter end.

After that he went to Constantine’s room and called the two men, who had spent the time with Constantine giving Persia romantic advice and Persia making snarky comments that consisted of calling Constantine words that were synonym with “sap”.

They had a silent dinner during which Kyla didn’t pay Persia any attention but ended up talking to Constantine about the man’s job. It ended up being more interesting than doodling on a computer all day as Kyla had imagined.

Once the dinner was done for, and Persia could have sworn that his mouth hurt from the false smile he had on, the three of them went to the TV and hooked it to Bulgaria’s PC he brought down from his room.

Constantine had tried to beg off the game night but Kyla had said “I understand if you don’t want a repeat of history, Tine. Civilization 5 is a pretty accurate game, after all.” To which Constantine had replied with: “Which is probably why you’re not in it!” At which Bulgaria defended himself saying he didn’t need to be in games to remember his history. Besides he played as Byzantine or Hunnic when he felt like playing.

This earned him laughter from Persia, calling him “whipped”, and a disbelieving “You play as me?” from Constantine.

As the game progressed the three of them, with both Constantine and Persius playing as themselves and Kyla choosing Hunnic Empire for himself, noticed that they were in the same continent. Remembering that he had to change his behavior and not think about only winning all the time Bulgaria consciously choose to pick regions in the tundra, even though there was fertile land right next to Constantine’s cities.

Persia, on the other hand, was relentless on where he settled. What is more he started building the Hagia Sophia in his Islam worshipping capital city. Constantine didn’t have a big enough army to stop this, as he had spent the past 20 turns building aqueducts in all his cities, so he just exhaled loudly. Just letting it happen.

At this Bulgaria, whose cities were still on the coliseum stage as he really liked it when his people had great happiness levels, knowing full well he couldn’t afford a war declared one on Persia anyway.

In the end Persia had had to switch from constructing the Hagia Sophia to training troops, giving an edge in religion to Constantine. Who had picked Orthodox Christianity and converted Bulgaria’s cities, just like he had done during the dark ages.

After that he did something uncharacteristic and went in and declared a war on Persia as well. Under the combined might of the other two players Persia fell. After which he started telling Bulgaria how to fight his war which was lead now with Byzantine.

Bulgaria had held back Byzantine and they both had great fun. That is until the spy selection had become possible and the war raged even further. They didn’t stop the fighting until the year 2050 and because of his more developed cities and the fact that it was him who took Persia’s capitol, Constantine won.

Realizing this the roman did a couple of happy jumps on the couch. To Bulgaria this was the sweetest defeat he had ever endured. If giving ground without making it too obvious was all it took to make his Tine happy then he just had to do it more often. 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The very next day Bulgaria woke up bright and early and made a quick breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast. After which he made some coffee, taking extra care with the picture of a puppy for Constantine’s cup, and went to gather all the materials needed for the dreaded pipeline.

He got copies from all the documents his politicians had send him last year and all the documents Ivan had resent him just this month. With that done and out of the way he picked a notebook, some pens, pencils and other tools for drawing.

With everything gathered he went to Constantine’s door and knocked hopefully. Not a view minutes later a very sleepy looking Constantine opened the door, his expression so confused for the early wakeup call that Bulgaria wished he could kiss the sleepiness away.

“Morning, Tine! Breakfast is waiting downstairs. By the way can you help me with a project I’ve been working on, since…about three days ago?”

“It’s the pipeline, isn’t it? I swear if this is a plot for you to foist all your work on me I’m going to…”

“Firstly, it is the pipeline. Secondly, I’m not dumping my work on you. I need your help. Since you have so much experience with the different types of soil and you have an engineering degree. And thirdly: It’s a neat distraction from your work and you’ll help me finish the project your brother send you to bother me for. It’s a win-win for the both of us. Come on, Tine, say you’ll help!”

Constantine looked at Kyla like he was really considering slamming the door in his face and going back to sleep, but something in his husband hopeful expression told him that Kyla was serious.

“Fine, just let me do my morning routine first. It’s six in the morning, wonderful…”

With that Constantine went to gather his clothes and headed towards the bathroom. When he got back in his room after enjoying, albeit guiltily, the perfect as usual coffee and the eggs that were perfectly proportioned with the cheese, he saw that Kyla had went ahead and made his bed.

He had also piled his desk high with all his papers and had went to his own room to bring another chair. With a heavy sight he sat down on his own chair and got to work trying to fix some of the calculations on the first paper as Kyla got to work fixing a report on the quality of the soil in a digging area.

The rest of the week past much like this. Kyla would wake him up at ridiculously early hours for them to work on the never ending stream of papers and it would take them from dusk till down. That resulted in an ignored Persia, who, in a desperate attempt to be noticed had started cooking lunch all by himself during that time period.

As Persius hadn’t burned anything even once, and his boredom seemed to be satisfied with doing such a manual task, Kyla let him experiment in his kitchen with different recipes. Sometimes he would even go downstairs and give pointers, which Persia thought of as his efforts paying off but Kyla just enjoyed his time with his sneaky friend.

The more involved in his project Constantine became, the closer he got to Kyla. They spoke calmly and Kyla was all business and didn’t mention anything even remotely romantic to him once. The more time like that past the more Constantine started to miss the sweet nothings he was being buried under usually.

Figuring his plans with Persia had been successful, as Kyla spent all his free time with the man after they were done working, Constantine just resigned himself to the change of interests. When he leaves after the three weeks were over Persia will remain and it would be only a matter of time for Kyla to give Constantine the divorce he had wanted for the better part of their marriage.

That thought made Constantine strangely sad. He was the one doing the tricking. He was the one pushing Kyla into the arms of others because he couldn’t let go of past slights. He had no right to blame him or feel sad about it now that it was finally happening.

Deciding to escape these thoughts and lift his mood a little he turned on zoom and picked a call with Ivan, Natasha and Katyusha. After a minute all three appeared on the screen.

“Hey, kiddos. How are you holding up in your house arrest?”

“I’m well, Uncle Constantine! Thanks for asking!” Began Katyusha and waved at Constantine. The girl always had a smile for him and had been the easiest to teach Christianity to, which made her easily his favorite of the three. “But what about you? I heard from Vanya that you got stranded at Uncle Kyla’s house! He is treating you well, da? If he isn’t and is being too pushy I’m going to have words with him!” Continued Katyusha, her smile turning into a slightly pouty face.

“Your uncle has been on his best behavior! I didn’t call to complain. I just wanted to see if you three are doing well.”

“Uncle, just so you know you will always be my uncle even if you divorce Uncle Kyla. Now if you would just agree to bless my union with Ivan…” At this Natasha stopped talking and gave him her best puppy eyes.

“Not even over my cold dead body will I ever bless your incestial fantasies, Natasha! Where did I go wrong with raising you? You know I will blame your infatuation all on your Uncle Kyla separating you three at such a young age to go prance around with Vanya around Europe! You stop bothering your brother or…well…damn I guess I can’t threaten you with sending you to your room for months anymore. You’re all grown up.”

At that realization Constantine’s face softened and he began to remember all the good times he had had raising the two girls. As Kyla had treated Ivan more as the son he never had and probably never will have and hadn’t let him much alone with Constantine. Instead taking him along to all of his travels.

His reminiscence served to block out Natasha’s further protests about how incest wasn’t so bad if the love was real and when the woman noticed she was ignored she stopped talking and with an angry huff turned off the video call.

“You know Uncle.” Began Ivan hesitantly. “Sometimes I think it’s only your and Uncle Kyla’s refusal to see eye to eye with Natasha that keeps me from being kidnaped from my own home and forced into a marriage I don’t want. Thank you for that. By the way what do you do at the house all day?”

“Yes, Uncle, I’m going stir crazy from being locked down in my own house with nothing to do. What keeps you busy?” Asked Katyusha.

“Oh, nothing much. I’m helping your Uncle Kyla with the pipeline project and doing my own job. That keeps me pretty busy.”

“So he followed my advice! That’s great! I mean…you help Uncle Kyla. It’s very nice of you, Uncle Constantine.”

“What advice? Vanya, have you talked with your uncle recently?” Said Constantine with a sickly sweet voice.

“Who? Me? No, well, yes. But it was about work. You know, Uncle, I have problems with my internet. The connection is breaking.”

At that Ivan turned off the call and Constantine was left staring in the eyes of Katyusha. Who began to speak in a suspicious attempt to cover her brother’s escape.

“You know, Uncle, Uncle Kyla is very thoughtful to include you in his project like that. He must have great trust in you. Maybe you should help him with other projects. There is this one that he said he’ll have finish for me two years ago but he has been fighting wars and playing video games instead. You don’t think you can remind him of it, do you? It seems that with you is the only time he ever gets anything done.”

With that Katyusha also turned off the call. And there Constantine stood, all alone in his room. This gave him the time to think. Both Ivan and Katyusha had acted suspiciously when they spoke to him. With Ivan all but admitting that he had given his uncle Kyla some advice and Katyusha quickly changing the subject.

He supposed it couldn’t be helped. Both he and Kyla had been the parent figures in the three children’s lives. Jaroslav had lived through their childhoods but he was a distant memory to his own children since he had foisted them off for his adoptive brother and his husband to raise.

The three of them didn’t want a divorce to happen. He remembered that they would get scared and usher him inside every time it would rain during the Dark Ages, afraid that a lightning would strike him and it would mean that he was divorced from their uncle.

He supposed he was being selfish in asking for the divorce. He had given as good as he got during the Dark Ages. Had enslaved Kyla for a time even. And yet Bulgaria had forgiven him everything and had tried his hardest to mend their marriage. What Kyla had refused to do was roll over for him and it might be petty but Constantine still couldn’t forgive him for it.

No, it would be best if he didn’t dwell on such thoughts and Kyla ended up with Persia. Just two more weeks and their marriage would be as good as over. Constantine had unknowingly gotten them married and now he was ending his mistake. It was as simple as that.

Deciding to enjoy these last two weeks of the longest commitment of his life he went downstairs and began talking to Kyla about the project Katyusha suggested.

It had been something Kyla hadn’t forgotten about and apparently was still working on it but his politicians had redirected all his funding and so he was still creating a fake identity to make a funding organization with which to fund the exchange of agricultural specialists with his own money.

The problem was his politicians had nearly figured out where Kyla kept his gold on his land, which he had hidden before going into a coma and so only he knew where it was, and he had to be tricky about converting it into money as it had a historical value and for what was worth belonged in a museum.

Deciding to be helpful Constantine asked Kyla if he needed any help and at that his husband all but jumped saying that if he was to move the among needed through Greece and Constantine’s bank account then the money wouldn’t end up being stolen and he wouldn’t need to create a fake identity as Constantine had Greek citizenship. 

After Constantine agreed to help in this blatant attempt at money laundering he was hugged so hard his ribs nearly gave out at the abuse. His decision to help had ended up with an all-nighter in his room where they smoothed over the details.

The morning came and went speaking with Constantine’s bank about receiving a large sum in gold and Kyla had called a helicopter to get the two of them into one of his cachets locations.

Constantine hadn’t wanted to come with Kyla at first, but after couple of whining sessions later he got up in the helicopter and they both dropped off the pilot at the checkpoint and Kyla flew them near peak Musala.

Once they landed Constantine was greeted with the sight of a big cave.

“If your location is so obvious how come no one has robbed you blind yet, Kyla?”

“Well, you see, and promise not to go on tirades about how I’m a Christian and it’s against my religion to make deals with pagan deities, I sort of made Tangra curse this cave in exchange for a percent of the treasure. Anyone that isn’t being lead here by me gets to trip and die in the cave and then his entire family meets untimely demises before they get the chance to make a search for the would be explorer. His friends keep dying too and that continues until he is forgotten.”

“So you made a deal with the Devil and doomed countless families to sorrow only to keep your gold safe. Wish I had thought of that. Any other places you cursed in hopes of remaining a procrastinating lazy ass?”

“Sure did, Tine! I have a whole room behind a cursed door in India’s bank, I mean Golden Temple. I had Tangra put snakes on the door and kill off everyone who can open it and destroy all knowledge of the password. That’s where I keep all my gold from before I met you, all 11 centuries worth of it, stashed away for rainy days. That place is where Tangra gets his money from so he guards it personally. If all my stashes in my land, and in Romania, Greece and the European part of Turkey get discovered I’ll still have everything from that room.”

“And I suppose all your stashes get divine pagan protection, Kyla?”

“Yep! Without worshipers Tangra would have been very poor if it wasn’t the deal he made with me. He may not have been a good God, but he is the best banker, that’s for sure.”

As they finished talking Constantine suddenly quieted down. They had gone inside and the man was stunned at the amount of treasure left at this place. Most of it had been his, at a time, and it had been given up as peace tax at one point of time or another.

As Kyla began to pile golden coins in a sack Constantine was drawn to a golden mirror with olive branches and doves engraved in it. Bulgaria had given it to him as a peace offering after Constantine had invaded him with Nikephoros I just as Krum had sued for peace.

Constantine hadn’t wanted to give a quarter and seeing as he had thought, and still did, that Bulgaria was stealing his land he had thrown a cup at the mirror and continued advancing. The mirror still had a crack in it. It was a pity. It was a work of art and would have had a great historic value if Constantine had accepted it.

As he made to caress the crack he tripped into something. Looking down he saw it was a golden cup. He picked it up and true indeed it was fashioned not only from gold and gemstones but from a skull as well. Poor Nikephoros had fought for him and to redeem himself in that pass to the end and yet he remained unburied to this day. His skull carelessly thrown on the floor in a God cursed cave.

He looked around and found a golden book. He flipped it open and began to read. It was one of Kyla’s many diaries. Written in gold to preserve his thoughts. Most of what was written in the pages he read from was about him and the children. Constantine quickly closed the book.

Moving on he noticed knickknacks he had gifted Bulgaria back when he still had the means to give such gifts. A bracelet here. A ring there. There was even a medallion. On a whim Constantine opened it and saw that the image of him on the one side was still well preserved. Had been polished, even. He still had his ponytail in this picture. The very same ponytail that Turkey had cut off instead of his head all those years ago. Constantine had never managed to bring himself to regrow it after his defeat.

“Well, these sacks should be enough! Let’s go home, Tine!”

With that Constantine was snapped back from his thoughts and before he could help himself he asked.

“Why don’t you melt down some of these useless knickknacks? Like the mirror…or this medallion? Why keep them and just melt down the coins?”

“It’s simple, Tine. This place is where I keep all the things that remind me of you. Forget a deal with Tangra. To keep this place safe I’d sell my soul to the Devil himself.”

Deciding not to comment on the proclamation, or at how touched it made him feel, Constantine just nodded. Just as they were about to get out of the cave Bulgaria picked up the medallion and put it around his neck mumbling how it was one thing he should have never abounded. Constantine remained silent for the rest of the trip. 

Once they got home Kyla melted down the sacks into golden bullions, of which he managed to get 200, and went to talk with his accountant about a gold transaction to Constantine’s bank, the medallion never leaving his neck. 


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

After the two of them had finished their money laundering scheme and Constantine had become the proud chairman of the whole exchange program they settled on completing other projects.

By the time the week was over Constantine had been roped in having a donation made to a hospital in his name, a couple of elderly homes, a homeless shelter and some private research that Bulgaria was doing for his agriculture.

Constantine couldn’t help but admit that he liked being involved. It was underhanded, true, but it made the Roman almost feel like he was a nation again. He guessed he would miss the feeling when the last week of his three week confinement was over.

Meanwhile Persia had given up on trying to gain Kyla’s attention and instead had begun to carry a notebook around, taking notes in it every time he saw Constantine and Kyla together.

One day when they were both alone and Bulgaria had left him to go and have the day off as he was working on what he only said was “a private project”. Constantine had gotten strangely angry at being excluded in the morning and confronted Kyla about it but after the Bulgarian had assured him it wasn’t anything shady like a weapon’s deal Constantine let it go.

Which left Constantine all alone with Persia who stole glances at him and took notes in his weird notebook.

“What are you staring at, Persius?”

“I’m just taking notes on how to be sappy and moody like you, since Kyla seems to dig it. No worries, I’ve been taking notes on how to be sappy and a doormat from watching Kyla, so don’t feel like you are the only one watched.”

Constantine exhaled loudly before asking:

“And why are you taking such notes?”

At that Persia gave him his best kicked puppy look before responding.

“The two of you are never getting a divorce. And the more Bulgaria includes you in his projects the sappier and moodier you get, which Kyla, but not in these words, had told me it means you are happy. So I’ve been thinking: If I somehow merge the two different types of sappiness you two have maybe I can become a better lover to Carthalo. Get him to come back to me, do you think it’ll work?”

“If you want advice on being sappy, go ask Kyla. Don’t stare at me like that, it’s creepy! And how should I know? I’m not Carthalo’s friend. He has always been the “orgy guy” that broke Kyla’s heart.”

“While Carthalo did indeed go to that orgy he didn’t partake and he didn’t even know where Rome was leading him at the time. He told me once as he was drunk. But don’t tell Kyla! Carthalo still sometimes calls out his name in sleep, I don’t want to be left with no prospects!”

At that it finally clicked in Constantine’s mind. So Persia really didn’t want Kyla! That bastard was just going to use him to get back at Carthalo for leaving him and then when Kyla’s romantic nature became boring to Persia he was just going to leave him and move back to someone else.

Constantine felt used. He never considered Persia his friend, or even a “family friend” but he still felt betrayed. He had been played for a fool. He always hated when one outsmarted him. What was worse Kyla would have been the one hurt the most out of this.

“I’m telling Carthalo of what you tried to pull here, you rat! He deserves better than you!”

“Oh, safe me the drama. He is already back with your father. I guess he was so emotionally distraught I wasn’t a doormat like his “one true love” he went back to mister second best. Rome is going to flirt with him and then flirt with someone else and then dear Carthalo will be back with me. This has happened so many times, little Tine, that it doesn’t even phase me anymore.”

Feeling strangely outraged Constantine got up and stormed in Kyla’s bedroom, where he hastily hid something on his desk. 

“You have to talk some sense into my father so he won’t lose Carthalo to that leech Persia! I’ve been helping you these past two weeks with projects now it’s your turn!”

“You want me to what…?” Sputtered a surprised Bulgaria. He begun laughing, thinking it was all a joke but then the serious expression on Constantine’s face didn’t change so he stopped abruptly. 

“Tine, I’m not talking to your father how to keep shit-eating Carthalo in his arms. I’m not talking with your father, period. He still calls me “my son’s disaster”. If you are so concerned with Carthalo remaining in a masochistic relationship with your father why don’t you try talking to him instead?”

“You’re right, father hates you. But you were Carthalo’s one big love and I have it on good authority that he still cries over you and I think he deserves to be happy. And father is stable enough for him to provide that! Don’t laugh, he is! And Persia just told me that Carthalo didn’t partake in that orgy all those centuries ago! So you have to help me get him out of that ring of going back and forth between that cheating bastard Persia and my cheating bastard of a father!”

At that Bulgaria stopped laughing and gaped openly at Constantine.

“He…with no one? I mean he didn’t cheat on me that night?”

“No! Did you even ask him if he did? You just assumed, cried about it and started insulting him! Now, since you know what he likes you will help father get an edge over Persia so Carthalo can be happy and maybe my father can be happy too! Do that and I promise…I…we can go on a…date. Just one!”

“Deal!” Came the lightning fast reply from Bulgaria. Constantine had thought that Bulgaria will ask him more questions about Carthalo. But maybe his “wild love” feelings of the past had vanished into thin air long ago. Or maybe Kyla was really serious about wanting to patch up their marriage. Constantine felt strangely touched at that.

While he was still thinking about it the Bulgarian had already gotten a call forwarded to Rome and it got accepted.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t my son’s disaster! How are you doing during these turbulent times, cradle robber? And why is Constantine staring at you like he is going to turn to goo behind you?”

“Rome, father! I heard you got back together with Carthalo after he dumped Persia! Is he fed up with you yet? Because if he is tell him Persia would like him back and Ow, Tine, don’t hit me!”

“This wasn’t what we agreed on! You are supposed to advise him, not tell him he doesn’t have a chance! Now give him your advice, Kyla!”

“Tine, Romulus has stolen enough lovers from me for me to know that he doesn’t need romantic advice. He needs to ask himself one question: Does he want Carthalo in his life or is he satisfied being passed over for Persia every decade or so. Because if he likes Carthalo so much he should have put a ring on him already. And hey, don’t glare, Tine. The three of them might like this arrangement!”

“As if!” Said Constantine and lightly smacked Bulgaria over the head again.

“Listen, father, If Carthalo is anything like Kyla, and considering they…loved each other before you stepped in but neither proposed marriage you have to do what I did and just…force the marriage along, I guess.”

“And where can I find any demigods to send lightning at me, huh, son? I suppose I can rope the pope into marrying us. But then I’ll get a husband who yells divorce every decade or so. Except I will have horns put on me by freaking Persia of all people. Force the marriage along, as if your marriage is so good that you have the right to speak! You’ve been whining about a divorce since forever!”

“You won’t get horns put on you! Carthalo will love you if you dedicate yourself this much to him. And my marriage is just fine, thank you. In fact Kyla and I are going on a date tomorrow! And he includes me in his national projects, which is something you can do with Carthalo. Include him in your projects, I mean.”

“Rome, who are you talking to?” Came a voice from the other side of the connection.

“Carthalo,” Begun Rome as he took a ring off his finger and twirled it in his fingers. “Are you happy with me?”

At that Constantine resisted the urge to squeal. His father was listening to him! Without much thought he sat down in Bulgaria’s lap, as it was the only free surface in front of the screen, leaned into his, now smiling husband’s chest, and begun to watch.

“Of course I am Romulus. Or I wouldn’t be here locked up in this house with you waiting out a virus. But you didn’t answer me my question. Is it someone I know?”

“Before I tell you.” Begun Rome as he got on one knee and extended the ring towards Carthalo. “I must have your assurance that you will marry me and become one with me and then we can take over the world through trade together.” He said in his most suave voice. “Or at least the Mediterranean Region, for old times sake.” He said with a wink. 

As he finished talking Carthalo’s face lighted up with a brilliant smile and he snatched the ring from Romulus’s hand, putting it on his ring finger.

“Yes! Romulus, I don’t know who put you up to this but…it’s the people that you are talking to, isn’t it? Who are they, I have to thank them. Move over!”

Finally seeing Constantine on the screen Carthalo took a couple of steps back and he uttered in shock.

“One of your children approves of me?! But, it’s Constantine. So the man behind him must be…Kyla. Kyla Bolgar I swear if you laugh over my happy moment I will gauge out your eyes with a rusty spoon and rid Constantine of you once and for all!”

At that Kyla snickered behind Constantine and started to lightly trace circles over his husband’s hips, enjoying the closeness.

“Nah, I wouldn’t even dream of it, father. Because that’s what you are to me now: my father in law! Congratulations on your marriage Carthalo, I guess you finally became an honest man! And you managed to get together with Rome too, just like you’ve always wanted.”

At that and the lack of insults Carthalo’s face adopted a guilty look.

“Listen, Kyla, I…”

Before he could finish Rome was on him and kissing him in full view of the screen. After he was done Romulus nuzzled their noses together.

“Now, what you were going to start, dear fiancé of mine, usually works only in pornos. This time around I’ll forgive you. But believe me when I say this Carthalo, you will forget all about your past fling in time. Now, kiddos, daddy Rome and daddy Carthage need some alone time. See you two on the wedding!”

With that Rome turned off the call and Kyla snickered again as Constantine clapped his hands excitedly in front of him and turned around in Kyla’s lap to face him.

“How did you know that marriage was the problem?”

“When isn’t it, Tine? Even its lack is troublesome. Heck, if what you dragged me off to was just an immortality transfer and not a marriage ceremony you would have left me long time ago. Now about that date tomorrow…”

“Forget about tomorrow,” Constantine begun as he gently kissed Kyla’s forehead. “We are not going anywhere tomorrow.” He continued as he kissed the tip of his husband’s nose. “We’ll spend the whole of today, tonight and tomorrow making love. And after that if you are good then we can go on a date.” At that he kissed Kyla full on the lips.

“But, Tine, Persia will hear us.” Protested Bulgaria weekly between kisses.

“Let him, he tried to steal you away. Let him hear that it’s not happening.”

Months after a much happier Constantine, who was now included in all of Kyla’s projects and had even gotten him to get a job in order to fill his free time with something productive, was sitting with his hand clasped in Kyla’s in a cave as a very confused Pope Francis blessed the union between Romulus and Carthalo.

All was well and Constantine spared a look at his finger where a ring was around it. The one thing that Kyla had never gifted him before. The one thing his husband gave to him on the day of their anniversary. His secret project, one of the many more to come as he piled Constantine with flowers and handmade cards for months and lifting his head to look at his husband Constantine could admit that he finally appreciated the gestures.

They were finally partners in everything, and that was enough for the Roman. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is all! Happy holidays everyone!

**Author's Note:**

> So this is chapter one done. The Love Lockdown remix that Kyla was singing to was the one by Glass Animals. Its even better than the original, worth checking out. I hope you all liked the chapter.


End file.
